Posted by: dougery | May 1, 2009

High Plains Drifter

As of May 1, Bike season is here. Yesterday, after a solid month of procrastination, I marched my girl down to Village Cycle and got her a tune up. Was prepared to pay for it and was told I had a complimentary Spring check-up. That, or maybe the bike-girl was trying to get into my bike-shorts, so to speak. let’s be clear, I don’t actually own bike-shorts, and lest my better half should stroll down to the shop and start breaking the thumbs of female employees, might I remind her of the produce men? But I digress.

Biking is great for a variety of reasons. The pro/con list between biking and driving Jeepie-Jeepie is a convincing one:

Biking Pros:
1. Exercise. 11 miles, twice a day, or about 2 hours of aerobic work-out per day. Since I’ve grown fat over the winter, this will do me a world of good. Seriously, I’m huge. I’m about a week or two from people laying their eyes upon me and whispering “Dear God, what is that thing?”
2. Saves money. Namely gas money. Which if this Summer is anything like last Summer, is a substantial chunk of change. We’re talking somewhere in the neighborhood of $500, easy. Thats a lot of Cheez-its.
3. Personal Glory? Last year, in my ‘rookie season’ I covered about 800 miles, or, about the distance from here to BK (Brooklyn, not Burger King, or possibly the Burger King in Brooklyn)
4. The absence of this and that.
5. All the cool kids are doing it.

Biking Cons:
1. Takes longer. About 50 minutes each way, depending on weather. Compare that against my drive time of about 20 minutes. And I once made it Park to Park (Lincoln to Hyde, but also the time it took between taking the Jeep out of park at home and putting it back in park on the South Side) in a shade under 14 minutes. Pretty sure I broke several traffic laws to say nothing of those of thermodynamics and physics.
2. Weather is often an issue. A strong headwind can add 10 or 15 minutes to a trip. Rain can be dangerous, let alone annoying and during July and August the mercury can reach in the upper 90s, wringing one out like a sponge to say nothing of heatstroke, etc.

But thats about it. Oh, and little fact that an accident on my bike will almost certainly injure or kill me. Take that, H1N1. And you thought you were so tough with your nucleic acid and your protective coat of protein sometimes referred to as a capsid!

Anyhow, my bike needs a name. I’m leaning toward Wilhelmina or the Lady Roose Bolton. Free free to lend a suggestion in the comments section.

Labels: bike or die trying, goings on about town

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